The Not-Simon Cowl

Involving the brave new world of knitting design, misunderstood accessories and feline models.



So here it is, my first 'proper' downloadable knitting pattern.  Best of all, it's FREE!  Just click here  to enjoy the warm glow of money-less crafty shopping!  Bask in the smug thrill of knowing that you've fed your knitting habit without spending a penny!  Gaze in wonder at the beautiful download appearing on your desktop for exactly 0 monetary outlay!

(And then return and buy lots of other patterns for real money, because I've got a cat to feed, haha).

Speaking of cats...   Who is this dapper fellow modelling my cowl?

Isn't he handsome?  I would use him for all my modelling needs - except that a lot of my other stuff is baby clothes.  I've descended far enough in to Crazy-Cat-Lady-ness, I think knitting baby clothes and then putting them on the cat would be a level of crazy I couldn't come back from...  

So, the beautifully modelled cowl is my first and FREE design available to download. (Did I mention that before?).  The pun title comes from a very predictable confusion stemming from a non-unexpected lack of women's accessories by The Boyfriend.  In short, it is a Cowl (basically a circular scarf) and not a Cowell (a repugnant peddler of dross, whom I would not wish to have wrapped round my neck).

Here's my 'official blurb'...

This cowl is designed to show off the best of two shades of variegated wool, blending them together to create lovely colour shifts all along the finished piece.  

The deep rib makes for a wonderfully practical neck warmer – you can wear it pushed down deep into your collar for a simple, elegant look, but as soon as a chilly wind strikes you need only tug at the top and – voila! – it expands up to cover your ears and chin too.  Invaluable for sneaky seasonal weather when you don’t want to bundle up in a massive scarf, but still want to be prepared for sudden cold snaps.  

I had beginners very much in mind with this pattern - I know that when I was starting out I found it really aggravating that all the cowl patterns I could find seemed to be either in the round or involve grafting, neither of which I felt confident about.  I've designed this to be knit flat in one piece, with some sneaky tricks to avoid the difficult stuff`!  This is a guaranteed no-scare pattern!

'Moomin' Blanket Square

I've had a bit of a break from the Boyfriend Blanket, whilst I busy myself with other secret plans and clever tricks...

However, I've just finished (or Finnish-ed?) the latest square - my version of Moomintroll!  I've loved the Moomins ever since I was a little girl.  A few weeks ago I was trying to explain to The Boyfriend exactly what the Moomins were (I have their pictures on my travel bag, which he was looking at).  One thing led to another, and very soon afterwards we found ourselves with tickets to Helsinki, to visit the Land Of The Moomins in person!

So this square is in honour of our upcoming Finland trip.  Other Moomin fans, please feel free to use the pattern for your own (non profit) use, as long as it is good, noble, and in the spirit of the residents of Moomin Valley!

New Koala Afghan Square

Here is the new koala square!

If you'd like a different version (or - hey - if you're just really, really into koalas - no judgement here...) you can also check out my other free pattern 'Cute Koala Square', which you can find on the blog post here.  (Todays pattern is the more 'realistic' koala - 'realistic' obviously in terms of how accurately one can capture the finer details of a marsupial through the medium of knitted wool...)

For some reason Ravelry keeps taking down my 'Cute Koala' pattern, citing 'non-original artwork and/or trademarked or copyrighted characters'.  This is really rather irritating, as:

a) It is a completely original artwork/pattern, designed by me.  Unless Ravelry have also now branched into artistic criticism and are accusing me of being derivative, which seems both unlikely and also a little harsh.

b) As far as I know, the koala community has yet to advance enough to seek adequate legal representation concerning trademarking their own image.  Although to be fair I've never been to Australia, for all I know it could be full of marsupial universities, crammed with studious young koalas brushing up on the finer points of copyright law.

However, hopefully THIS pattern will escape the wrath of the Ravelry gods.  Here it is:

As always, it's free for your personal use, as long as your intentions are non-profitable and generally noble :)

Acorn-y Pun...

A defining feature in our relationship has been The Boyfriend's love of spectacularly cheesy puns.  I felt this really needed to be incorporated into the blanket somewhere, so I've given it my best shot!

Here it is - acorn-y pun to say "I'm nuts about you!"

I knitted mine using Hayfield Bonus Chunky in Grouse (815) and King Cole Chunky in Sea Spray (557), but it should work with any gauge of yarn. This photo shows the square as yet unblocked.

Feel free to use it for your own punning purposes!  (Provided they are non-profitable and nice, please.)

Koala me maybe?

As a good (part) Australian, it is imperative that The Boyfriend has a koala square on his afghan throw.  I actually designed two of these - one straight into the pattern generator off the top of my head, and a more realistic one first drawn out on graph paper.

I'll probably knit up the latter one first, as two koalas on one blanket may be pushing it a little, even for an Antipodian...  However, it seemed a waste to not do anything with the first design, so I'll post it here for anyone who fancies knitting a koala square!  I'll knit the other one and post it and the pattern in a few days.

Hope this knits up right for you if you try it!

Heart Squares

There's quite a few heart squares in this quilt - it is a 'Boyfriend Blanket' after all (soppy).  As all the squares are slightly different sizes, it's nice to have a nice simple motif to knit up quickly to fill in the gaps.

This first one was by Sarah Bradbury, based on a free pattern on her knitting-and.com website.

The second two were designed by me - please feel free to use the designs for yourself in any way (for non-profit use :) ).

I really like the Four Heart Square - I just wish I'd done it in colours with a greater contrast.  However, I'm sure I'll do a couple more, so I can experiment with colour variations then.

The second heart square I designed has our initials in it.  Obviously the chances of anyone having the same initials is a little slim, so please personalise the pattern however you please!  I've left the original letters on the design, to act as a guide for placing your own.

The Obligatory 'Wren' Blanket Square

In which Wren bemoans the lack of wrens immortalised through the art of knitting, decides to do it herself, and goes quickly insane.

Well, it had to be done.  You can't have a Wren-knitted blanket without a wren square, can you?

The first problem was, it turns out to be surprisingly difficult to find knitting patterns featuring wrens.  As in, impossibly difficult.  Zilch. None. Nada.  I couldn't find anything that would work.  So, I decided to design my own.  "How hard could it be?" I thought.  Yeah, have you seen my last post?  I'm not good with ambition vs my actual abilities.

I armed myself with some graph paper and a pencil.  Having recently completed my own (really pretty simple) designs for a Leo symbol and some hearts, I was feeling pretty confident.  Rather dangerously confident.  Because the second problem was: wrens are really a bit weird looking, when you get down to it.  Almost spherical, with surprisingly long, thin beaks, and their tails cocked almost vertically behind them.  If you already know what a wren looks like, then you'll recognise a drawing of one straight away.  If not, you'll think it's a drawing of bird done by someone who's really not very good at drawing birds...

The way I described it to my boyfriend was that "they look like normal birds - only gone a bit wonky".  At this point he made some unfavourable comparisons between this description and myself, which for the purposes of romance we shall gloss over.

Anyway, I was worried that the uneducated might see the blanket and just think it was a wonky bird.  However, I can't help the way wrens look - and if I was going to put a damn wren on the blanket then it was damn well going to look like a damn wren.  (I was starting to get a little frustrated at this point).  So I sat down and drafted a wren pattern.  And then did it again.  And again.  And again.

Herein lay the third problem.  A sensible, organised and patient person would have taken the very messy draft and spent some time redrawing it into a neat and easily readable final copy.  Unfortunately I am neither sensible, nor am I organised or patient.  I was excited about starting this square, so I jumped right in, semi illegible pattern and all.

I swore.  I got a cracking headache.  I swore some more.  I had to unpick entire rows.  I swore a lot more.  It took about five times as long as any other pattern that size had taken me.  But I finished.  And in the end, I really am quite proud of how it looks...

I could, of course, have left it at that.  However, a) I'd just discovered this cool little online knitting pattern generator, and b) as far as I knew, I had just created the world's only flat worked-afghan square-intarsia-wren-design.  What if, somewhere, somehow, someday somebody else wanted to knit a wren blanket square?  What would they do?  I felt I owed it to that unlikely future person to make the design available.

And so we come to the fourth and final problem.  My hand drawn design, illegible enough to begin with, was now covered in scribbles, crossings out and corrections from where I'd been following my stitches as I knitted.  The swearing and headaches were repeated, only this time in technicolour and with surround-sound.

But I did it.  Again.  And if anyone anywhere in the future is ever desperately searching for a wren afghan square, then this, my friend, is for you...

It's free for any non-profit/non commercial use you may wish to put it to!

My version was knitted in Hayfield Bonus Chunky 815 (Grouse) and King Cole Chunky 557 (Seaspray).

Leo Symbol Afghan Square

Square number one of the Boyfriend Blanket - a Leo symbol.  Because he's a Leo, obviously.

Although this isn't the first square I completed, it is the first I designed, and the first I managed to convert to a digital version.  (I used this free online generator - it's very useful for basic patterns).

The square is knitted in chunky wool, in intarsia.  However, I don't see any reason why it wouldn't work if you wanted to knit it in one colour dish-cloth style, alternating purls and knits to make the pattern.

If you are a Leo, or know one, feel free to use the pattern for your own not-for-profit use!

Wool used:  Hayfield Chunky 0936
                   Hayfield Chunky 841